solat..

just now was talking to 1 of my friend..
bout study,time management and solah..
its good to talk n hear opinions bout this stuff..
and im starting to realize about the hikmah of solat..


long time ago,schoolhood season..
our parent woke us up early at 6am..
solat,breakfast and went to school..
we were all fresh and spirited..


came back home,solat zuhur,lunch and prep class..
then we went for sports till maghrib..
all those while,we were on our top of enthusiasm..
segar bugar,mata bulat,cergas and happy..


then after taking shower,solat maghrib..
watching television,solat isya' and back to study up until 11 or 12 at night..
we were so sustained to our study..
and then tido...

here in moscow,im getting confused..

why cant i concentrate on my study..

why does my every single day is so droopy,sleepy and boring..

why is it so unpleasant to live here in moscow..

like waking up from sleep just to survive another day and wait for the sleeping time..

i go to the class with sleepy eyes..

sleeping in the class..

looking at the clock every single moment."cepatlah abes class"

and dont really give attention to teacher's words..

im here to study..

to become a doctor..

to learn..

im suppose to have the inquiry..

to learn more and get as much info as i can from the teacher..

cuz im gonna be needing it more than ever in future..

but it seems to me that im here just to waste time,

and wait for the graduation..

but heres the thought,

if i graduated,

if i manage to be a doctor,

with what am i going to treat the patient??

i wonder..

but now,
i realize 1 thing..
this whole 3years of living in moscow,
its so frustrating,boring and meaningless..
cuz i neglect the most important thing in life..
solat..


its not that i never solat..
but i didnt really emphasize the significance of solat..
for me,solat was just an compulsory act for being a muslim..
the sincerity was never there..
i thought that sincere in solat,was just opening my heart to sujud to him..
just for the brief moment while performing it..


but now,it never is..
the sincerity is about taking it as part of our life..
the meaning of solat is so broad..
its not just spending our 5minutes to solat..
but to humble ourselves upon Him..


without it,life is meaningless..
my life crumbles just for neglecting the 5minutes solat..
my life is frustrating cus i ignore the 5times solat per day..
my life is meaningless like waiting for the death to welcome me,
cuz i just look at solat in a close-mind..


ever since i take it serious,
my life is improving..
wakes up early in the morning,solat..
then for another an hour,i read my class notes..
without sleepy eyes..


then in the class,still sleepy sometimes cuz i sleep late at night..
but later after class,which usually filled with sleep hours,
myself is still fresh and spirited..
more extra time to study..
thanks to that,i managed to answer therapy's question with confidence,without toyoling and my answer is longer than usual..
grateful..


then at night,
eversince 1st year,waktu maghrib la paling best tido..
cuz im all tired and plus there was like no gap between evening and night..
but now,at7,taking shower and maghrib,then isya'..
after performing solat isya',my body is fresh just like after waking up from sleep in the morning..
camni,baru la bole nk study..

thanks god for opening my eyes to this fact..

i will try my best to hold on u..

and keep my faith to u..